Wednesday Wing: Chicken Soup

I recently had the whole of London Fields round for dinner and wanted to serve some choice chicken leg cuts a la these Bin Bones. I'd fed them to my nana and she has more vitality than ever and says her hip hasn't stirred since then either. But I went back to the halal trash and all I could find was this chicken soup. The ringworm noodles were an inspired addition. Bon appetite...

Thursday Thigh: Notting Hill Carnival

If there is anywhere in London chicken bones will be rife for a party, it's Notting Hill Carnival. It's really the only reason to go apart from getting shot, stabbed or to have a quick acid shower. These little carnival goers are hot toeing it with the best floats and parade people like they own the event. The top shot shows the lengths these bones will go to to make the carnival a memorable event. Thanks to avid boner kittydonks for risking her bones to get these lush snaps.

Friday Feast: Street Bucket

I almost felt like gathering up all the bits of this installation and freezing them to show my friends and family for the next 60 years. Maybe even glue it all together, cover it with a sheen and cherish it on the mantlepiece and start a family heirloom to be handed down to the next 3 generations. I needed to do something as its pretty much the most peaceful thing I've seen since I stepped over the high homeless lady at Bethnal Green tube last week. In the end I settled for a quick poo in the bucket, so the next person couldn't enjoy it as much as I did. Unless they were some feral sick fuck.

Wednesday Wing: Squished Family Pack

This is far and away the best smushed meal I've come across. It's picture perfect, but a real shame, as there is probably some horrible story associated with it. I'm guessing either crutchman beat up a kid taking home his families dinner for some meth shrazza, or there was a hit an run which went awry. Maybe the chicken was the reason for the homicide. Jealousy perhaps? Either way, I should have drawn a chalk line around it, and then had a feast...

Saturday Salmonella: Cup of Tramp Piss

I could have easily set this up and put a bone in the cup. But that would have meant unleashing a worse stench than the Dalston Market. Plus if a drop of that putrid vagrant jello got on me I would probably still be pooing out my mouth.

Thursday Thigh: Soggy Box

MMM...We did need the rains, even if it means the streets are full of wet boxes. This looks like a classic 3-piece meal, hold the drink. Most likely blown out of the greasy hands of the drooling eater, as it seems barely touched, and the saucey chips in the middle haven't all been devoured . You've always got room for saucey chips.

Wednesday Wing: Chip Mutiny

This is the most serious day in the history of chicken drummer's since the Colonel set up shop. The chips are holding a mutiny. Apparently they are sick of the chicken smell overpowering their boxes, and chips are in the majority in any box meal. Their qualms are they only like to be smothered in ketchup, gravy, and mayonnaise and be eaten out of fishy boxes. This could spell the end for BonesEast. I hope the overnight summit meeting at FCKF can resolve the tension. Check back tomorrow...

Wednesday Wing: Healthy Bone

Does fruit ever come as part of a greasy chicken combo? Really? No fucking way, that's the opposite morals from what the greasy chicken is trying to achieve in the east. I'd say this banana peel is some sort of organic food preacher, dragging his lil' wrinkly skin around the streets handing out the '5-a-day Health Eating Habits Bible' from the first whiff of chicken at dawn, til he needs a cup of tea at bout 3. He also aims to cut bone's smoking habits by a third. Food Power!